Struggling Lately? You Might Be Feeding the Wrong Wolf

There’s a story I want to share with you.

It’s simple. But it explains so much about why we struggle… why we feel stuck… why we feel shame and less than, and why sometimes life just feels heavier than it should.

It’s an old Cherokee story.

A grandfather is talking to his grandson about life. He tells him that inside each of us, there are two wolves.

One wolf is full of anger, fear, jealousy, resentment, shame.
The other wolf is different - it is positive, loving, hopeful and peaceful.

And the grandfather says these two wolves are constantly at war inside you.

The grandson thinks for a moment and asks:

“Which one wins?”

And the grandfather replies:

“The one you feed.”

Why This Matters More Than You Think

Now, most people hear this story and think:

“Okay, be more positive.”

But that’s not what this is about.

This isn’t about pretending everything is fine.
This isn’t about forcing positive thinking.

This is about recognising something deeper:

You are sum total of the stories you’ve decided to accept.

The Negative Wolf = False Stories

That negative wolf?

It didn’t just appear.  It’s been trained.

Over years, you have had false stories put upon you:

  • things people said to you
  • labels you were given
  • experiences that hurt
  • environments that shaped you

Maybe you were told:

  • you’re the “difficult one”
  • you’re not organised
  • you’re not smart enough
  • you always mess things up

Or maybe it came from more subtle places:

  • comparison
  • rejection
  • religion
  • expectations

And over time…those moments became stories.

And those stories became your inner voice.

How to Spot the Wolf You’re Feeding

Here’s the key. You don’t find it when things are easy.

You find it in moments of resistance.

When:

  • you hesitate
  • you feel fear
  • you want to step forward but don’t
  • something small triggers a big emotional reaction

That’s when the wolf speaks.

So instead of pushing it away… observe it

Ask:

  • What am I saying to myself right now?
  • What story is running here?
  • Where have I heard this before?

You Don’t Need to Fight It

Most people try to “defeat” the negative wolf.

That doesn’t work. Why?

Because the more you fight it…

  •  the more attention you give it
  • the more energy it gets

Instead…

You simply stop feeding it.

Rewriting the Story (This Is the Shift)

Once you identify the story, something powerful happens.

You realise:

This isn’t truth — it’s conditioning.  It's a false stories.

And if it’s conditioning…it can be changed, the story can be re-written.

This is where your power is.

Not in forcing positivity.

But in choosing a different story.

The real story, the one that recognizes your amazingness.

The Truth About You

Let’s be really clear.

You are not:

  • your past mistakes
  • your worst moments
  • what someone once said about you

Those things may be part of your story…but they are not who you are

A Simple Practice for This Week

Here is something you can try:

For the next 7 days:  Notice when something negative comes up

That’s it.

Don’t fix it.
Don’t analyse it deeply.

Just notice it.

Write it down if you can.   What you will start seeing is pattern, where negative self talk and negative stories come up.

And once you see the pattern…you can re-write the story.  Re-authoring you narrative will stop the negative thoughts and free you from things that once held you back.

Final Thought

That negative voice?

It’s not you.  It’s just a wolf that’s been fed for a long time.

And the moment you see that…everything starts to shift

If this resonated with you, I’d love to hear what came up for you.


Get on our list and Get My Regular Musings, Tips and upcoming events 

Feeling Overwhelmed? Try This 5-Minute Reconnection

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked

{"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}

You may be interested in